and guess what i've been doing while march crossed over? powerpoint slides.
this occupation has been making my life outside of clocked working hours zombified. well, ok, to do some justice, it isnt all that bad. but then, it is no doubt that the beginning of this, especially so with an assessment is making many many of us feel like this isnt what we signed up for. that we dont see the joy in what we saw last time. same goes for me. during the bad days, it can get very bad. but some days, some little things just brightens the picture up again and keep you going. needless to say, the support i get from people who care enough to give it to me. thankyou. :) yup.
things have been good, then bad, then worse, then seems like nothing can get any worse, and the cycle continues.
sigh, sometimes, i really really wish i can have a change of brain. or selective memory erasure. that will make my life so much better. really, it will make me so much happier, at least that's what i think so. because of that, it really drives me crazy at times. it makes me a person that i dislike, that i wonder "how on earth did you get here?!". yup. but at the same time, it feels like its not as if i have the choice to be like this. haha. bipolar disorder, typical of people from my profession? i wonder.
but really, i really really really wish there was something called selective memory erasure. well, if this has got a bigger significance, then i really really hope that it will go away. or at least, not bug me anymore. and there's a fine line with i've had enough and my brain just refuses to recognize and care about it kinda "not bug me anymore" vs the i am fine with it; it doesnt bug me anymore kinda "it doesnt bug me anymore".
if ure lost, it's ok.
it's late now, rest well world~
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